Thanks Guys

This video is a great example of happy and healthy sexual expression in the right way, to the right people.  As you can see, the still shot shows male nudity, so anyone who does not wish to view the video doesn’t have to.  But if you’re curious, you have the opportunity to view something constructive and affirming about male sexuality.  The hosts simply impart information about what they like and what they do, rather than telling the viewer what they should do, or any other kind of preachiness.  This approach is critically important; there are so many YouTube hosts out there who assume they are supposed to TELL people what to do, even when they are clearly operating from a point of profound ignorance.  It’s annoying.  These men, on the other hand, don’t have to announce their expertise, as it becomes self-evident the longer you watch.

This video is more powerful than that for which many of the commenters give it credit.  Some appeared to be shocked.  One even discounted it as an “excuse” to show his penis.  That’s too bad.  I say it’s about time!  Incorporating the genitals back into the male body as a whole is crucial to the healing of men everywhere.  Another commenter asked what cock rings are for.  People are ignorant about sex, but they are also curious.  Who isn’t?  Sex is wonderful.  And there are a surprising number of cool things you can do with your junk.  Good job guys!  {>^<V}

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Halloween Seventeen I

What a month.  October, that is.  All sorts of fascinating things have happened in my life, and I hope the same is true for you.  On Tuesday, the thirty-first, the supervisor where I volunteer took me out to lunch.  She wanted to do something to thank me for my efforts, and also to go over the schedule for an upcoming event.  Additionally, she surprised me with a part-time job offer!  It was very exciting.  I’m moving up and out into the world, as making connections and becoming part of a team is a bold new achievement for me.  After being disabled for so long, I am now experiencing some long overdue confidence building and life progress.

I dress up in business formal attire when I go in to the office.  After all, it’s at a pretty fancy place downtown.  It’s a big deal to me.  It’s an important part of my new morning routine.  I lay out my clothes every night so that they are ready when I get up at six on volunteer days.  My supervisor and her boss dress in business formal, so I decided why shouldn’t I?  But no one else there does.  So, as one can imagine, my appearance is a great way to stand out from the crowd without having to say a thing.  And, sure enough, people have started to notice and take me much more seriously, especially the men.  This is what I am discovering about working:  it has very little to do with work.  Sure, I get tasks done, but the actual working part is only about twenty percent of the deal for me right now.  The other eighty is getting up, grooming and taking care of this wacky body I have, dressing of course, gas for the car, getting myself there on time with a belly full of breakfast, and trying not to get some of the breakfast on my business formal clothes!  It just goes on and on.  It’s fascinating.  Including every related activity, I clearly spend far more time and calories on the stuff around the computer work I do for the organization.  The work is really just an afterthought.  But I understand that it could have something to do with the fact that I am still at the beginning of a business office career; perhaps it will feel different after I am endowed with greater levels of responsibility.

I have, however, decided that working has a LOT to do with sex; cologne mingling with crotch smell and ball sack pheromones, some tasteful jewelry mingling with body hair, a chunky new wristwatch, a gold-plated tie bar, the unavoidable bulge in the front of a man’s slacks, and his voluminous glutes in back….  It’s often wrapped up in a man’s self-concept and self-esteem.  I’m sure many men have already gone through this process years ago, but I’ve never lived like this before–I didn’t realize how much fun it was going to be!  It is an enhancement of the things on everyone’s mind, yet no one openly talks about:  what’s underneath the accoutrements of alpha manhood.  My wardrobe feels like a sex-drenched extension of my physical body and all the nifty decorations Mother Nature gave me to begin with.  A real gold chain around my neck brings the eye to my chest hair on days I don’t wear a tie.  Unpacking myself at the urinal reminds me of just how much bush is being covered up down there.  And, of course, there’s the bulge protruding from roughly the center of a man’s body.  However I sit, stand, walk, or talk, the outline of my good stuff is always there–and that’s how it should be.  The reminders of raw manhood, albeit obscured a bit for modesty and professionalism, subconsciously direct the right people to my root.

On a subtler note, there is the intrinsic sexiness of a “cocked” fedora framing my flourishing beard, which again refers to my thick, mature, bush underneath.  Currently though, I meticulously shave around my mouth in a veiled attempt to articulate that my other mouth down below is perfectly depilated, and open for business.  It ALSO refers to the fact that I won’t give razor burn to a guy’s face or asshole.  Clearly it’s an extremely sexual thing for me, but if it has no effect on someone, it’s okay because to them it’s just a facial hair style choice.

Sometimes I think working is really just an excuse to meet people.  When you get right down to it, most of working for a living seems kind of unnecessary; like it’s nice to do, but not critically necessary to the functioning of human civilization.  So, if that’s the case where you work, maybe it’s time to accept that God gave us school and work mostly for the purpose of getting together with guys for making love.  A man’s sexuality needs the proper and satisfying avenue of expression.  If you don’t have reasons to demonstrate your intelligence, physical strength and endurance, artistic genius, fashion sense, or problem-solving abilities, then how will all the other fuzzy little monkeys out there know you wanna get laid?  At work at least, show them with body language and other forms of nonverbal communication.

I have big plans.  And, as I have attempted to enucleate, they have almost nothing to do with my current job description, although completing clerical tasks at lightening speed with great accuracy is yet another way to show off my masculine prowess.  For example, getting noticed for working like a “mad skills machine” on Excel isn’t that far removed from fucking like one, right?  I am getting back into lifting now that my knee is better.  Therefore, next spring I can roll up the sleeves, of my short-sleeved dress shirts, to expose the fullness of my biceps.  I’ll still be in a tie of course, but in a physical state that necessitates the ends of my sleeves having to pick a notch either above or below the bulge.  I say the former rather than the latter is the way to go, don’t you?

Let’s see, what else could I get away with?  What ideas do you have?  What types of pleasing feats of manly expression in the office (or just strutting down the street  for that matter) do you practice?  Please share them with me and others.  Let’s get this party started!  {>^<V}

Going, GOING, Weird

Guys seem to feel pretty comfortable with me.  And I am finally starting to feel more comfortable with myself.  It’s a self-propelling snowball of healing.  I have started to meet some pretty cool guys, guys who know how to talk and act like real men.  We are learning things from each other.  And it’s fucking HOT!

Apparently, this new medicine I’m on is making me have these wild double ejacs, because it has happened in the same way twice now.  It happens when my dick is inside a guy’s butt or mouth, and not when I masturbate yet.  But anyway, it’s really something so I’m going to verify with my doctor that it does not represent some kind of dyskinesia or other permanent injury from the medication.  I believe it falls under the side effect listed as “abnormal ejaculation”.  But abnormal could mean awesome as I am quickly finding out.

When I feel close to cumming, I relax and a large amount of semen comes out of my dick under a moderate amount of pressure.  Since I’m new to jizzing inside of a guy’s body, I don’t squirt it out hard like when I’m jacking myself or getting a handy.  But it definitely comes out.  The new friend I was with last night, Cameron, told me he was surprised at how much jizz there was in his mouth.  I also started taking some male enhancement supplements that have augmented my loads as well I think.  So when the guy released my dick from his mouth and spit out all the jizz, the same feeling happened in my dick again!  My dick told me it wasn’t done yet and I jacked myself to another much bigger orgasm and squirting out a bit more semen under the usual high amount of pressure.

The first time this happened was in Arnold’s rectum.  I came, and then my dick wanted me to thrust some more for the second climax.  It was my first time topping, so I thought it was an anomaly due to fucking a butt for the first time or whatever.  But now it happened a second time in an identical way!  Wow, thank you Mother Nature and pharmaceutical industry I guess?  I’m not entirely sure it’s a bona fide “double” ejaculation either; I think it’s more than likely one emission and orgasm, just spread out in a different way.  I hope it’s safe for me as a side effect.  Like I said, I am going to check it out with my pharmacist and doctor.

Life is a work in progress.  So many things are going better in my life that it’s hard to believe that I did something to injure my knee, but I did a couple months ago.  But, thanks to this medication, I’m not worried about it as much.  I can still swim and go nuts on my upper body lifting workouts.  And I can turn this situation into a positive by using the recovery time to fix the asymmetry in my back and develop cardiopulmonary endurance in the pool.  Then I can focus on growing my ass and legs again.

Things are looking up.  I used my epilator to remove all the hair from my perineum, which makes getting fucked much easier and more fun because the ass hairs don’t get caught between the dick and my anus.  It’s a great way to start caring for your anus and rectum.  It makes cleansing easier and other maintenance care such as anorectal moisturization, massage, and stretching and strengthening exercises.  It feels good to get to know your whole body, and stop thinking of any particular parts as being dirty or bad.  The colon, rectum, and anus can actually be quite clean on a regular basis, especially with lots of loving, patient attention, both directly and regarding diet.  I started to play with my anus several years ago, so I am quite familiar with what is going on down there, and the transition from using my rectum as an elimination organ to a sex organ is quite smooth for me now.  But it took time, care, gentleness, love, and attention.

It is what we men are meant to do:  to experience great health and pleasure from our pelvic floor, especially the prostate.  The more love and attention the prostate receives from your bros’ dicks the healthier it will become, and worrying about prostate problems will become a thing of the past.  It is the natural way we are meant to live, I believe.  {>^<V}

God, He Id Naa’t-dy, Yo

Think about how nasty nature is.  Mother Nature makes no apologies about anything She has created, or gets us to do.  Nature just gets the job done, in a hot nasty way, even when circumstances are against it.  Arnold and I had an enjoyable evening last night.  We alternated between me sucking him and him fucking me with my dildo.  I got us to take our time and relax, and I think Arnold followed suit from my example.  His dick is nice, comfortable in my mouth.  And his shot was even nicer.  It feels so awesome to make your bro squirt.  It’s so dirty and hot.  Arnold and I are definitely friends with benefits in the truest sense of that term, as there is no romantic angle to it at all.  Just bros doing what bros do best:  gettin’ each other off in the funnest possible way!  We don’t hug or kiss or anything like that.  But it’s such a good, laid-back time.  We had something to eat and drink while I washed the dishes, watched a movie, and then he asked if he could play with my masturbation cream and pulled his pants down.  I always leave the fun stuff–lubes, condoms, latex gloves, massage oils–sitting out in my place for just this reason.  This is the time when I feel such happiness for the gift of gay sex.

But on some level, I still put myself under pressure, a habit I am constantly trying to get rid of.  It’s a dreadful habit from years ago, when I would feel extreme anxiety to perform with guys.  So when it came to my turn, I got that same old annoying nervous feeling as he went down on me, despite my best efforts to just RELAX.  Anyway, it took forever for me to cum.  There’s no way he could use his mouth for that long, so he switched to jacking me with his hand.  But this is my buddy; he didn’t care.  In fact, he mentioned the positive aspect of the sex lasting longer in my case.  Also, the longer it takes for me, the bigger the load as well.  It was about four or five shots total–big gloppy squirts, the largest one of which landed all over my face and couch cushions.  (God don’t care about the couch cushions.)  Success!  But why don’t I feel successful on the inside?  I have successfully learned to be pretty relaxed when it comes to pleasuring/sucking/hand jobbing my bros and bringing them to ejac.  But I still have yet to come to terms with the reverse role.

I feel hurt, angry, and frustrated!  My nerves and dick and psyche don’t respond the way I want them to.  And I don’t want to just give up and say I’m a total bottom, because I know that I’m not.  For a while, I feared that maybe I permanently damaged my dick nerves with the enlargement process.  But I have since decided that is impossible because my morning woodies are hard as rock.  So it must be psychological in nature, and also medical?

I am getting some much-needed benefit from a small dose of an antipsychotic, but it’s definitely messing with me in other unfortunate ways.  This antipsychotic seems to be working for me by dulling perceptions a little bit, so I don’t get set off by them in either a manic or depressed direction, which is good for everything EXCEPT cock functioning I’m figuring out.  I don’t really know for sure of course, but this is my hunch.

Also, I’ve been masturbating and NEMOing on my back for years.  So that is the hydraulics state my body is used to.  My dick doesn’t stay hard when I stand up, so I practice getting aroused and hard while standing and walking around the room so I can fix this trend.  The drug is doing so many wonderful things for me, I don’t want to go off of it.  But I wonder what I would be like sexually if I weren’t on any medication?

I feel hope for a healthier, younger, more virile, future (due in part to the new drug making me feel good things like hope, peace, and happiness).  I am also of the opinion that furthering my body fat loss will fix a LOT.  If I lose enough fat, there is the possibility of going off of some of my medicines, and changing my life in a much more significant way.  There are at least two I may be able to get off of.

I have hope.  I believe in my dreams.  I have changed and healed for the better.  Mother Nature finds a way.  She did last night when She got me to squirt a bunch of thick gloppy jizz two feet in the air, despite my sorrow and other probs.  It was really nasty and quite a show.  That’s why I want to get into porn.  If I can just manage to iron out these other issues, I’ve obviously got some raw talent here.

I ask God and Mother Nature to help me heal my mind, heart, body, and shlong in every possible way.  I love how hot and nasty you are, Nature, and I want to participate in your messy, semen-drenched gay fuckfest to the fullest, as is my birthright.  I’ve got news for the lazy fags of this world:  real life can be like the pornos, AS LONG AS:

  • I am as patient and kind, and warm and loving with myself as I am with my bros.
  • I never give up on my health goals, and remember that I have hope and genuine capability for remarkable changes still to come.
  • I allow fears to pass away as I simply let go, and experience my bros pleasuring me one moment at a time.

There, I feel better.  I’m on track for today.  Workouts, fat loss diet, going to play tennis in a few minutes with new guy I met from a personals ad.  He says he’s an intermediate player like me, but we’ll just have to see how compatible we are.  He also claims to have an eight inch cock.  But that’s not nearly as important as how big the organ between his ears is.  And in his chest.

I know I’m weird, but I have the ability to socialize now so I’m going to take advantage of it.  What is your gay male sex life like?  Training tips, sex skills and experiences?  I would love to hear from you.  You can now follow my Facebook page and get all my posts from this point forward on there.  But don’t forget to check out the July, 2017, archive, available on the WordPress site.  Thank you.  {>^<V}

Ahoy Cap’n NEMO!

Squeeze and release.  Squeeze and release.  When you get right down to it, that’s all that the climax of sexual response consists of.  Whether it’s the relatively quick succession of contractions that pump semen out of your crotch, or the longer muscular contractions in other parts of your body, it’s really about getting in touch with your body on the primordial level.  It’s the basic experience of your physicality through your own skin, muscles, and breath.  That’s why fucking is so closely related to working out and big emotions such as joy and rage–these are the emotions that usually get you to want to do something physical.

Yet most guys don’t know anything about this or, if they do, it’s on the most superficial level, or it comes from a needlessly complicated and affected place such as Taoist philosophy.  Reading some sort of instruction manual about how to achieve non-ejaculatory male orgasms (NEMO) may be a good place to start for some.  But it’s always better to just be told the truth from the beginning.  If you’re alive, then your body is already prepared to experience great love, sex, and dry and regular orgasms.  It’s that simple.  If you have muscles that you can contract, then all you have to do is practice nudging them in the pleasure direction by cultivating your horniness.

I started learning NEMOs when I was twenty-two years old from a book written by a Taoist healer and a western writer.  It was okay.  I guess I did learn some things, but it was a bit fussy.  All I really needed was practice in “reading” my own body and letting it lead the way through a decades-long journey of self-discovery.  I think books and research can help get one started, so give them a try if you truly have no idea what this post is about.

I also started playing with my rectum at that early point in my life, such that now I am very aware of what is going on down there.  Many guys have only recently started learning about sex and their bodies, so I feel quite frustrated that I am so far ahead of most men in this regard.  Hopefully I’ll meet a wise gay sexual dynamo like me soon.  Are you one?  If so, please write me today.

Anyway, back to dry cumming.  What does the body consist of for the most part?  Muscles, bones, organs, and skin.  Therefore, eventually feeling a full-body NEMO might require getting in touch (no pun intended) with your skin organ, which is the largest organ of your body.  Touching, caressing, stimulating, and playing with yourself is great fun–all over yourself.  Let your hands and fingers go where they want.

The next thing I figured out, with my particular body, is that my lungs are the pathway to bringing my orgasmic contractions away from my pelvic floor and into my upper body.  What I do is calm myself down and relax for a while before taking in a deep breath.  I hold the breath for a few moments and feel the sex feeling down my middle and start contracting my pelvic floor, legs, stomach, pretty much everything, even my neck, face, arms, and my hands turn in to fists.  And I start breathing again, of course.  It’s like a cum that never fully finishes, so it can last indefinitely.  It’s a great way to feel your personal POWER.  After a little bit, I bring it down and totally relax and breath normally.  But I don’t feel spent like one does after a regular ejac, so I can start all over again in a few moments or minutes–whenever I want–because the horny feeling doesn’t go away.  It’s a great way to make lovemaking LAST.

The loser guys, who believe sex is something that is literally supposed to last a few seconds, are missing out in ways they can’t possibly imagine!  I met one once.  I know he was trying his best, but he came while trying to put it in my ass; he couldn’t even get it in, much less thrust in and out.  He actually LECTURED me that real life isn’t like the pornos where the guys fuck forever.  I was like, have you ever tried it big guy?  I don’t know what they do in the pornos, but in REAL LIFE, a man can fuck for hours if he really wants to.  It just takes time, maturity, self-awareness, healing, and patience, all of which most men do not possess.  Another irritating thing this guy did was dribble instead of squirt.  I guess in real life, men don’t shoot like in the pornos…  Jesus God, could this guy be any lazier?  He really had a lot going for him:  a huge gray grower of a dick, over six feet tall, full beard, very nice.  But if you never get healthy, functional, positive information about male sexuality, then I guess this is how you end up.

I also think dribbling is unhealthy, because it prevents the full evacuation of the contents of the prostate which, over time, could lead to prostate problems.  You wanna get that stuff outta there, preferably in spectacular fashion!  It’s not showing off, it’s showing yourself and other men what is possible.  That’s why cultivating a group of friends, who get to know and trust each other, for fuck parties is so critically important for the healing of men.  The more men experience each other sexually, the less they will fear their gay sexuality and their own bodies.  In other words, if you see a lot of other men’s bodies, you intuitively learn that your own body is okay too, and you stop comparing it to the bodies of models and porno guys.  Admittedly, their bodies can be amazing and inspiring, but if you look really closely, you can see that they’re not perfect either.  No one is.  Every man’s body has uniquely charming features that can be expounded upon.  What are yours?  Please let me know.

So naturally, I now have a taste for Captain NEMO and his fabulous full-body fucks.  It’s fun!  Todd is really into it.  So I am in the process of getting more comfortable doing it in front of another guy.  It does take some explaining though.  When I find a guy who is into it (and let’s be honest, why would he NOT be), I try subtly to get the point across that it might look like I’m in some sort of pain, or having a seizure or something, but really I’m having an orgasm.  It’s taking place in other parts of my body, that’s all.  That usually makes sense to most guys.  Todd did continue to ask me if I were okay, even after I explained it, but that is very understandable in light of my going bonkers with NEMOs.  I mean my facial expressions get kind of crazed after a while.  I kept reassuring him, and it worked out beautifully.  Like everything else in life, this is an imperfect process that takes time and patience.  Yet, as complex as this might sound, it pales in comparison to what it takes to have a healthy friendship/relationship that continues to be safe and rife with functional communication.  Todd is a good soul who tries.  I am a good soul who tries.  Therefore, we have the potential for a long lasting adventure; the work of a happy sexual friendship never ends, but it is fun work that makes you glad to be alive, male, and super gay.  {>^<V}

Having Problems Really SUCKS

I got probs.  And the more men I meet, the more problems I uncover.  We learn who we are by our interactions with others–this is the normal way of life, and it’s long overdue for me.  Fortunately I already knew this, so it’s not as shocking and disorienting as it might have been otherwise.  But it still sucks greatly to discover that you have psychological issues with sex.

I have never had normal, functional sexual relationships before.  So, now that I am forming them, I experience so much stress in the bedroom that I shock my body into getting sick with a cold or a sinus infection.  I thought I was past all that because I started supplementing with some vitamins my pharmacist recommended, and had ceased getting sick all the time.  But now it’s happening again.  Ugh!

Years ago, I got into a very bad habit of feeling such incredible fear and pressure when I was with a guy, that I never calmed down from it.  So now it sneaks up inside of me and I don’t realize it until it’s too late.  It’s so ingrained I can’t just choose to relax easily.  It’s going to take some practice with a great new friend I made in Todd (pseudonym).  How did this happen?  How did I get into such a panic about sex?

It’s because I didn’t start soon enough, or on the right foot.  The first sexual encounter I had, I was so petrified with fear I gave myself diarrhea the next day.  I was twenty-one I think.  I had had relatively good experiences with masturbation since the age of thirteen so, naturally, I get hard pretty easily when I’m by myself still to this day.

But with other guys…such a problem for me.  My friend Todd is so wonderful.  He is patient and kind and understanding, just the sort of chap I need.  All things can be healed with enough love and patience.  And I might need a lot.  The topping of Arnold was an excellent example of this.  I somehow got myself to relax and respond naturally.  I didn’t have performance anxiety because he was new to it as well.  Somehow I must have decided on a deeper level that I was going to be calm and relaxed.  Perhaps I didn’t care how my dick performed with Arnold because we were just experimenting.  But with Todd, I think I got back into my old habits because I wanted to impress him and make him feel good and show him how horny I was for him.  The more I want my dick to get hard, the softer it gets!  It must be a form of distraction; the mental wanting of my cerebrum takes the energy away from my brain stem.

It’s also the ambivalence my subconscious still has toward being male and topping.  I understand why guys are total bottoms.  If they had a similar problem growing up, then it makes sense that they might just give up on penetrating altogether.  But, of course, there are many all-bottom guys in the world, with innumerable reasons for how they got that way as adults.  Gay lovemaking with my beautiful new beaux (Arnold, Todd, and Spencer) is supposed to be fun!  But I must be patient with myself.  Rome wasn’t built in a day, and neither is the pillar of sexual healing.  {>^<V}

Rosy the Wiener

White guys can be so hot.  I’ve noticed that if a white guy has a rosy face, then his dick and scrotum are usually rosy as well.  But if he has very dark features, such as one of those five o’clock shadows that makes his face look gray from a distance, then his dick and balls can be gray or even olive.  I’m one of the rosy ones.  So is my friend Todd.  His entire cock is pinky, not just the head.  So are his lusciously full lips.  I don’t think there’s anything more beautiful in the universe than a ruggedly handsome guy–you know, muscles, beard, chiseled brow and jaw–who has the lips of an angel, or the eyelashes of a doe.  Once I met a guy at the gym who looked like he was wearing rouge, that’s how naturally pink his cheeks were (face cheeks, that is).  I have ridiculously rosy cheeks.  It’s probably due to my Swiss-German ancestry.  I wish I got a thicker/blacker beard and bush, but oh well, you can’t have everything.  I’m sure there are darky guys out there who wish they had my eyes or something.

But I digest (just kidding, I know the word is digress).  Anyway, one of the darky kind of guys was fucking me one recent Saturday night.  A darky fucking a pinky!  He had the very full, dense five o’clock shadow I mentioned, complete with dimples just like Tom Selleck.  But somehow this guy was even hotter.  He shaved his body hair except for his bush, so that only made it stand out even more!  I complimented him on it, and he laughed awkwardly like he was embarrassed.  I pulled his gorgeous muscular hindquarters in close and asked him to go as deeply as he could so I could feel that beautiful black bush tickle my scrote.  I don’t think he was prepared for my exuberance.  What a waste of sumptuous bush and elephant-gray dick though.  He seems to be another clueless guy when it comes to conversation and making time for his sex life.  To make a long story short, he might be one of these turds who believes that his time and schedule are the only ones that matter.  I feel disappointed.  I wanted to get to know him.  He seemed nice underneath his stuck-uppery.  He had a really neat house too.

Oh well, once God closes a door, something better comes through the window.  I shall assume that I will meet a wonderfully kind, warm, and communicative guy very soon–a guy who is both a darky and a pinky at the SAME TIME!  Thick black stubble, dimples, eye lashes like a Mediterranean waiter, and the bright, blushing face and ass lips of the newest member of the Swiss Guard…

A guy like this for example:

Andre van Vliet

André van Vliet, world-renowned organist.

{>^<V}